All I want for Christmas…

If you know me…you know that Christmas (to quote Buddy the elf)…is a GINORMOUS event in our family…and it has been for most of my life. 

We Ellis’ love a good Christmas season.  My cousin a few years ago had her Christmas wreath (or tree?) up the day after Halloween…we carry the same genes and are made from the same mold, and we like to stretch out Christmas as long as possible.  So I welcome Christmas music in early November and I often times have my decorations up through New Years Day. 

Every day of December I have a stocking that is filled with something for us to do to prepare for Christmas day.  A daily advent “stocking” activity: an act of service, cookies to bake, a musical to see, a present to wrap, a song to sing, a live nativity to experience.   I do miss those little stockings over the mantel, and haven’t quite figured out how to convert my family traditions to our UG apartment.  There are more reasons that I will discuss later as to why I have not gone all out and done Crazy Jenni Cockerham Christmas in Uganda…but the girl who goes BIG at Christmas time is a bit of  a Christmas minimalist this year! 

Minimalist at Christmas?  It can’t be??  Jenni, surely you can find other options and ways to celebrate and prepare!?!?  I actually think if I had realized we would still be here for Christmas I would have likely devoted an entire suitcase to be filled with decorations, treats, and Christmas comforts.  So there is that.  But here the Christmas decorations are a RACKET.  First of all–sorry–I try to only say positive–but this is my favorite season and I have very very high expectations for Christmas decorations.  These are honestly a bit gaudy, WAY over-priced, and remind me of something to be found in my grandmothers attic.   One wreath I found was 153,000 shillings which is about 60 bucks.  It was spray painted silver pine cones and some sort of twigs and branches twisted together!   Christmas lights are expensive, and I just keep thinking I don’t think I can pay for something I have back in the states and love for something that is SO expensive and uses a different socket than at home!   I did however find on the bottom shelf of a grocery store a wreath that you will see pictured below.  It was 7,000 shillings.  I made them do a price check twice because it is a plug in wreath that lights up and also flashes and does other crazy things.  Something I would have passed by at Target, but a GEM that is displayed proudly in our kitchen right now!   (This–to clarify was $2.75!)  What?  Thank you God for this little Christmas miracle!   Besides the wreath we have decided to go homemade this year.  We did an advent tree made of plastic plates so every day we count down to Christmas by checking out our tree that hangs in the window.  Also Kylee and I worked VERY hard to make these snowflake/Christmas stars ( paper snowflakes ) that hang over our kitchen table!  (Thank you Sarah Mullins!)  They were an absolute craft highlight so far…but there are more Christmas crafts to come!  

                                                       (Yep, a tad bit different this year!) 

                                  (These just make me HAPPY!  7 Snowflakes for the 7 Cs!)

All of this to say–Christmas is different this year.  One difference is without all my stockings, and shopping and other distractions the daily advent reading ( JESUS STORY BOOK ADVENT ) has been our Christmas focus each day.   Our advent time has been so very sweet to have a daily reading from something that EVERYONE can understand.  And to have discussion and prepare our hearts not just weekly with my beautiful purple, pink, and white candles…but daily has been good for my soul.   Thank you Sara Walters for suggesting it–it has literally been and will be our focal point for Christmas this year.   For those who are interested in a daily family reading between now and Christmas, check this out…her blog also has great ideas about how to do daily activities as a family to prepare your hearts and minds for Christmas…it is only the 3rd…they are short you can catch up quick!  (The author of this blog sounds almost as nutty as I am about Christmas…but I win…I just do.)

The biggest difference I have noticed about Christmas is the kids’ conversations.   Kylee is trying to figure out thoughtful homemade gifts for her friends.   About a week ago I overheard her say to her friend, “All I want for Christmas is my mom and dad under the same roof.”  Wow.  That will stop you cold.  And considering that I am sweating like crazy this December, this is quite difficult to do!  Coming from Kylee, whose love language is “gifts,”…she loves to think of thoughtful things to do and create for others!   She is always helping ME be creative and thoughtful with my gifts for family and friends.  My birthdays have exponentially changed for the better over the past 9 years because thoughtful Kylee ensures that my next birthday is better than the last.  This girl gives and receives love through gifts.  So for Kylee Cockerham to say, ALL she wanted was for her mom and dad to be in the same place about laid me out.  If I was hoping my children would have some perspective change while spending a few months in Uganda–I believe we are close to mission accomplished.  I know we all have many more lessons to learn while we are here–but I am truly truly thankful for the things that we are learning and the ways my children are maturing.  It was Mary who was told good news of her son and she “treasured them in her heart”…this mom is treasuring the life lessons that are being learned and the ways that He is transforming ALL of us from the inside out.  We will NEVER be the same! 

So THANK YOU Uganda for a more quiet Christmas.  For not having the Christmas displays that distract and cause me to go fill up my cart with stuff that will rust and pull my heart away from what really matters.  I am glad Christmas items are a bit gaudy and overpriced because it is allowing for hours of quality time with my daughter creating snowflakes and memories that will last a life
time.  

I am also thankful for the opportunity to spend this Christmas with new friends.  We hosted a December 3rd Christmas pancake breakfast at our place this morning–not fancy but the pancakes were green and reddish (pink)?!?   Our friends’ hubbies headed back to the US yesterday so our houses are all wives flying solo and I knew that the morning after Chris left I would have liked to have a pancake party!  Love these precious people and the things that I am learning from them, the fellowship for our children, and the ways that I have felt so supported during the time while Chris has been away.  

                              

                                                           Check out her “winter” scarf!!!

           Jonathan with his pancakes and honey–he doesn’t like any bread without it!

                    Smiles and clean plates from little boys with earaches make me happy!

  (I am sorry but please stop and get excited about our rockin’ wreath for $2.75!)


There are more Christmas blogs coming–it is a subject too close to my heart.  But I pray as this month begins that you will take some time to TRULY slow down.  That you would not let the glitz and glimmer or the “to do list” distract from what really matters this season.  Because the parties, friends, family, food, service projects, and the rest are good…but if they take away from the true meaning of this holiday…one that came from VERY humble beginnings with no glitz, glam, or glory.  Then maybe just maybe we need to re-think our GINORMOUS Christmas holiday

May You Be a Blessing and May Christmas Be a Blessing to You

Jenni 


    

Cockerham Family Christmas Card 2012

Merry Christmas! 
            

Once again our Christmas card is green

No matter whether we are saving trees or money…let me tell you I do love holding your cards in my hands…so thank you for sending your lovely letters our way!  

Here’s a quick digital download of 2012…

My little bro graduated from UNC                Kylee danced!
and 
made 
his 
way 
to 
UVA
to
begin 
med 
school
                                               

In May we welcomed a new member to our family…                                  

In October we took a life-altering trip that started in London…

and landed in Uganda…
                                                       

                                 

Watoto left an impression the size of Africa on our hearts!  

The kids dressed up…
One Nature Fairy, Will Turner, and a last minute change turned our “Pumpkin Pirate” in to a “tough” Brown Ninja…

This year provided laughter…



required some real effort…                

                               and expanded our world view!                   


2012 took us on some incredible adventures and allowed us to see the world with new eyes.   It filled us with a strong desire to invest more and more in things that really matter.

So whether we run, laugh, dress up, travel, or lift and load thousands of boxes, we hope to see this world not as our oyster but as a beautiful place filled with beautiful people.  People we hope to know.  People we hope to befriend.  We hope to inspire others to invest in relationships too.  So whether they love people close or far away…their lives and relationships would effect change.   

We don’t begin to pretend to know all that this means and we are pretty sure it is going to be messy.  It is only His grace that makes us worthy.   But by His grace we hope 2013 will be filled with more of Him and less of us. 

This green card is about to turn super FANCY…or weird!?!  Close your eyes and picture opening a Hallmark card that sings to you…press PLAY on the utube video…
(or if it is just too weird, scroll down!)


“It’s funny how it takes a holiday
To show us how the world could truly change
If we all took the time to really care
There’d be a little more of heaven everywhere.”
Heaven Everywhere–Francesca Battistelli
May this holiday find you ready for a New Year with New Beginnings, New Relationships, and New Opportunities to make a difference in this world and in the lives of those around you!

You are a Blessing and we are Blessed to call You FRIEND!

Love,
The Cockerhams 

An Unusual Christmas Wish

Recently I read that America’s greatest fear is inconvenience.  We want it our way, fast, hot and now.  We don’t want to wait, so now there are two lines at the drive through.  We want to get all of our groceries, garden needs, and clothing items in one quick stop.  In many ways we have achieved a very convenient way to live…we have grown accustomed to it and cannot imagine life without it.  

I think a better translation to all of this is that we want to be comfortable.  We want there to be an ease of life.  There is enough pain and discomfort in the world and so by our very nature when possible, we choose comfort.  Though quite understandable–ironically, it is in our discomfort that we grow.   On a run yesterday, I was reminded how uncomfortable running can be.  When I run I learn much about enduring, about pushing past my pain; about discipline and mental strength.  All these attributes surface in a few short miles while I endure discomfort.   

In our discomfort we also realize that this world is not about us.

After a lovely dinner, the beautiful host sat us down and shared her heart.  She shared her newest thoughts about the Christmas story.  And Mary.  She shared of Mary’s disgrace.  Who believes a little teenage girl who says that she will be carrying the Son of God in her belly for 9 months?  She shared of the public and private humiliation she must have endured.  Babies out of wedlock were not only disgraceful–they were unlawful.  For a time, a she experienced a broken relationship with her fiance.  The host spoke  of Mary’s discomfort.  Can you imagine giving birth in a barn?  Without your mother…with only a teenage boy as your nurse maid?   She did not live a comfortable life.  A carpenter’s wife.  She also experienced major changes of direction, not only with the obvious birth of an unexpected baby, but also with an quick uprooting move to Egypt when her child was very young.  My precious friend reminded us that Mary accepted disgrace and discomfort…she traded them as God’s will and portion for her life.  She shared that Mary’s courageous response was, “Never mind what people think of me…I will glorify the Lord.”  (not a direct quote–but her general sentiments!  Luke 1:39-55)

On that cozy couch last night I was reminded, God really shows up in the discomfort

I want Mary’s heart.  May I accept…or (eeeek) welcome the discomfort of this life…knowing it is where He dwells…it is where great things are birthed.  

Thank you Aliene for reminding us to shift our perspective.  Thank you for having Mary’s heart, for being willing to endure discomfort and disgrace for the glory of God.  Thank you for using your gifts to remind each woman that she is a treasure.  
(http://treasuredministries.com/) 

Over the next few days as this year quickly moves to a close…might we dare whisper a new prayer for 2013…God may I move away from the things that bring me most comfort…so that I might better see and know your heart?  

May You Be a Blessing and May You Be Blessed!

Jenni 



Presents, Parades or Prophecy?

“Do we HAVE to listen?”

“Yes…it is 7 verses.  Just listen.”  

Those were the objections from my oldest and my rebuttals as we discussed our December 1st scripture reading about the prophecy of Jesus.  I get it.   She would rather be opening presents from her Granddaddy that we are visiting for the weekend, or going to the Christmas parade where Santa throws candy from a fire engine that is scheduled for later in the afternoon.  Christmas seems to have more flare to an eight year old when it is wrapped in bows or covered in sweets.  I am glad we pushed through…

As I read Isaiah’s prophecy (9:2-7) I realized that the kids might actually be able to share helpful thoughts throughout this month on what they are learning in December.  

We read, 

“…they rejoice before you as people rejoice at the harvest…”

The object lesson was ideal this morning as just minutes before we had looked out over my dad’s farm and saw the land where the soybeans had been harvested.   Later that afternoon they took a combine ride…we literally experienced a view of “the harvest.”  

So I pushed…

“Why would someone rejoice over a harvest?”

The one who had not wanted to have this discussion piped in, “hmm…because they had been waiting for food for months to grow and they finally can eat it!”  

Okay.  Good.  

Moving on, 

“Unto us a child is born, to us a son is given.” 

Same child, “well, babies take a long to time come–so that was probably exciting too.”  

“Yes.  Now–this was not just any baby–tell me about this baby…”

The middle child, “this baby will rule over the world, He will be the prince of peace.”  

My baby pipes in, “he will be someone to praise.”   (Then he ran off after his Granddaddy and the dogs.)

“So what is this really about?”

“It is about waiting…just like we have to wait for our Christmas presents from Grandaddy and Grand Pickett–the people were waiting for this baby.  It is hard to wait…I bet it was hard for them to wait.”  

“Yep, and I bet they REALLY were ready for this baby–cause we are REALLY ready for our presents!”  

Isaiah talks about the people being in darkness.  They were longing for a Savior.   Farmers still wait for the harvest to come…and mothers anxiously await their child’s birth, children wait for Christmas presents on Christmas day…we understanding waiting.  I can only imagine the anxious anticipation from long ago as the people awaited a Wonderful Counselor, a Prince of Peace…a King that would uphold justice and righteousness from that time on and forever!  

Through this baby there would be HOPE.  I am so thankful that we are able to celebrate the birthday of One who enters in to darkness and brings peace.  

May You Be a Blessing and May You Be Blessed!

Jenni



The GIFT Doesn’t Matter…So Get Over It!

Don’t get me wrong.  

I LOVE a thoughtful gift as much as the next girl!  But as we have simplified over the past 6 months I am acutely aware that THINGS don’t matter.  

So please do not spend the next 27 days obsessing over what to buy your mother-in-law or your children for that matter!?! 

As I have purged I have asked the question:  “When is enough, enough?”  We live with so much more than the rest of the world and we rarely feel satisfied or content.  In reality, we have plenty.   Without a single present under the tree.  Plenty.  So the first thing I suggest is being creative with your gifts…

Recently I heard:  “something you want, something you need, something you wear, something you read.”  I like it.   Others give 3 gifts representing the 3 wise men who brought gifts to Baby Jesus.  They were WISE men.  And if it was enough for Him, it is probably enough for my kiddos! 

There is a sale in our ballet studio right now and I bought Kylee’s leotard and tights for next year.  The saleswoman (who might have felt sorry for my child who was getting the “needed” items for instruction next year as a Christmas present) suggested that with the leotard I make a gift card for her to go to dance camp this coming summer.  It is something she will beg to do–why not make it a special gift?!  I love it…done.   

As for the folks on your list that are hard to buy for?  We all know it really is not about “the gift” but about the thought and love behind it…

Get creative!  Consider going global…

 (Sevenly )  is one of my new favorite sites.  It is a little like TOMS where it is a “gift within a gift!”  

Give a COW for Christmas??   (World Vision Christmas Gift) allows you to give amazing gifts to families in need all over the world in the name of the person you giving to

This is an AWESOME MINIMALIST LIST  with 36 additional suggestions on keeping it simple…and not about the STUFF.    
May You Be a Blessing and May YOU BE A GIFT!

Jenni 

20 Days of Christmas…a short story

This is the account of 20 days of Christmas that occurred this past December.  It is written in deep appreciation for all who shared their time, resources, and talents and for a precious family who opened their home and lives to others.  It is NOT a blog…it is a short story.   When you have time, sit by the fire, snuggle in with your computer and celebrate with me all that God did to bring about “the best Christmas ever!”

Note Of Thanks
Thank you does not begin to express the gratitude in my heart for the role that each person played in caring for the Booker Family this Christmas. 
The memories that I will have of the month of December 2011 are rich and I will treasure them in my heart for many, many years to come.
I feel so blessed that I was able to be one of the “messengers” to provide hope, joy, and love to this family.  Through our many visits, my husband and I were quick to remind the Bookers’ that we were just the “messengers.”  We just became the “deliverers” of others’ generous gifts.   Over the past 20 days, from what started with 3 women, grew to upwards of 75 to 100 people sharing what they had to care for and supply the needs of this precious family. 
This simple note of gratitude turned in to a short story spanning the past 20 days of Christmas.  It would take a novel to share every detail or express every emotion.   I could have spent weeks writing and yet I am almost certain that I would still not be able to adequately document all of the details, background, or even the emotion expressed by those who were a part of those magical 20 days.  As the “keeper of the stories” I still felt it was important for others to see how their “thread” was woven together in to a beautiful tapestry of generosity, hope, and love.  When you have a few quiet moments, sit down, grab a cup of coffee, and join me.  Marvel and celebrate humanity’s generosity and a Sovereign hand that brought these two unlikely worlds together. 
Determined Not to Miss Christmas
We have all heard of the famous Christmas carol, “The 12 Days of Christmas.”   This year I was fortunate enough to experience “The 20 Days of Christmas.”  
My husband told Hope Holly Springs that last year (2010) we “missed” Christmas.  As painfully true as it was–it was still hard to swallow.  Don’t get me wrong…last year was full.  At times it was full of some really wonderful things–tree trimming, baking cookies, and Christmas productions.   But it also was full of obligations: presents to buy, parties to attend, people to entertain.  It was packed so full of “things and stuff” that in our efforts to make memories and solidify traditions, we simply missed the essence of Christmas.  Last year starting on December 26th I spent several days in a funk because I knew I had missed it.  I also knew I would have to wait another 350ish more days until I got another chance to do it again.   This year, determined not to miss the true Spirit of Christmas, we picked a family off the “Tree of Hope.”  This family was designated by Wake County schools as a family in need of assistance over the Christmas season.  Our “job” was to help provide their children with some clothing and a gift from their wish list.   MANY families were chosen from the tree…but I am certain that this family was chosen for us.  In my lifetime I do not believe I have seen God so active and obvious in such a short concentrated span of time.  There were just too many coincidences…too many pieces that fit together “too” perfectly.  Each thread woven together seamlessly and at the end there was a beautiful friendship that formed, hope delivered, and lives were changed. Thanks to the Booker Family and the many people involved in this story, I did not miss Christmas this year!  No, the Spirit of Christmas has filled the past 20 days of my life and I hope it’s impact will continue to spill over in to my next 20 years of life! 


The Story Begins…
          My initial phone call was made to Sophia on December 6th.  I was a little nervous to call as it is sort of a strange “exchange” to explain why you are calling and what your intentions are.  Quickly Sophia put me at ease with her excitement and gratefulness for our willingness to help. 
After my first phone call to Sophia, I realized that there were much greater needs for this family than simply some clothing and Christmas gifts for their children.   A friend had offered to bring Christmas dinner and so I asked Sophia if she might be interested in a friend providing their Christmas meal?  She paused silently as if somewhat shocked or as if she was processing the information.  She then explained that her family had had an electrical fire and lost their stove.  She shared that a meal would be ideal as she was not certain what they would do for a holiday meal this year.   Apparently, they were cooking on an old hot plate and a griddle.   
As the conversation continued I realized that they were not just a family of 6 but the children’s Grandmother and Great-Grandmother lived in the home as well.  Over time, I found out that they had another daughter who lived locally, who was pregnant, with a grandson just days from being born.   Quickly it became apparent that this was a larger undertaking than originally expected. 
The family did not expect us to provide more than some simple gifts and clothes.   Deep within my being I knew that much more was needed and that if we could provide some of these “household necessities” this was going to be a very special Christmas for all parties involved!  I wasn’t sure if in 20 days anything significant could be accomplished…it was the “thick” of the holiday season…but I shot up a quick prayer for hope and generosity.  What happened next was beyond my wildest dreams or imagination. 
3 + Compassion = Unimaginable Generosity
What started as two families caring for the Bookers quickly turned in to three.  My friend Allison is a “connector” and has an unparalleled heart for serving those in need.   She shared this story with her family, her neighborhood, her friends, and her friends’ friends. Through her heart, passion and connections, we delivered 5-6 truck loads of household items over the next 20 days of Christmas.  
It really started with an email that Allison sent mentioning that she knew a couple who owned a couch.  The couple was hoping to donate this couch to a family in need.  At the time I had not phoned the Bookers, nor did I know that their home needed furniture.  After Sophia and I spoke and I learned of the stove fire I realized that there might be other furniture needs.  Sophia explained that they had moved in to their home prior to her husband losing his business.  They moved so that they might have more room and also be in a safer neighborhood.  She explained though, that they did not have the furniture to fill this more spacious home.  When asked if she might be able to use the couch she paused in what I now know was shock and amazement.  (Another “need” met without asking!  We had never even met one another.  How would I know about her needs for a stove or furniture?)  But a sovereign God knew and used others generosity to provide it.  
Moving…Furniture and Hearts
My husband and I borrowed a truck from a friend. (We used their truck 4 different times to deliver goods back and forth—yet another provision!)  Our first stop was at the home of the kind “New Yorkers” who owned the couch.  They were so happy to share what appeared to be a brand new couch!  Incredibly, the couch had been on Craigslist with no prospects, for over a month; but on the very day we arrived to pick it up—someone expressed their interest to purchase it!  The couple explained that even if someone would offer 100 times it’s original price, they would not take it now…they were so overjoyed just to be able to give it to a family that really needed it.  In addition to the couch, this couple offered a toaster oven that was in great condition.  We don’t believe that they had knowledge of the Booker’s need of a stove.  They seemed touched to know that this oven might be able to be used to cook for the family of eight! 
My husband and I delivered the couch to an empty room.  It was a huge improvement!  Vivian (the grandmother) kept saying over and over, “it’s beautiful!”  I could not agree more.  The email that started with a question about a couch began a huge chain of emails and generosity that poured out upon this family.   Those 5-6 truck loads that we delivered included items such as beds, mattresses, dressers, book shelves, end tables, lamps, bedding, a crock pot, blankets, bags of clothes, toys, and much more!  There were new needs met daily and it appeared that each gift delivered was hand-picked by God for this family.
 
The beautiful new couch was then paired with a brown chair (donated from another family) that matched as if it had been a set in a show room.   The giver of the chair had explained that as a kid, he grew up in the Bronx and he appreciated his parents desire to provide for him…and he hoped to give to this family so that they might be able to provide a better life for their children.  
Back to the Basics
I had noticed that the Bookers’ kitchen appeared somewhat “bare” and so in a blog I mentioned simple things like canned goods would be appreciated.  A friend brought over 2 bags of food that she intended to donate to the food donation drop box at Lowes.   She took the bags of food earlier in the week prior to receiving my email—but the box was not out that day.  She loaded her bags back in car only to come home and learn of the Booker family and my request for food.  She delivered the canned goods and a gift card for more groceries.  The next time I visited Sophia, she enthusiastically brought me in to her kitchen and showed me the fresh fruit on the counter and the pantry full of food.   She was SO grateful for this gift and it was something that was clearly intended for the Booker family!  
One of the first conversations that I had with Sophia revealed that her children needed new shoes.  I had asked her if there were other “needs” not mentioned.  She explained that the children’s shoes had holes and several had worn through the soles.  This broke my heart and I knew I would have to figure out how to get the children new shoes.  This wasn’t in my “original” budget…but I lifted a silent prayer knowing that the shoes were a “top priority”.   I shared with my two friends (who were helping with the family) about the immediate “needs” and “wishes” of the family and Allison responded immediately explaining that her mother desired to purchase the children shoes.  Incredibly, her father was a cobbler and she believed that no child should be without proper shoes!  So on a Saturday morning she met the family at Dick’s and bought all of the children brand new shoes.  My father in law believes we all should have comfortable shoes and a comfortable bed and I was so very pleased that these precious children would be leaving the store with nice,  new comfortable shoes!  The smiles were contagious. 
Kids get in on the Action
Sophia shared that her daughter had some disabilities with her feet and she needed a wide shoe.  She also explained that the school would often call and ask Sophia to pick up her daughter due to discomfort that she was experiencing throughout her day.  My daughter (who wore the same size shoe) was given a pair of Uggs from a friend last season.  Even though Kylee enjoyed them, she also had plenty of other pairs of shoes.  The more Kylee and I talked, the more we discussed how much these shoes might be a great gift to Vanessa.  They were wide and really fit more like slippers.  It was so sweet to see Vanessa’s face of excitement and hear the reports that these shoes not only fit but were comfortable for her feet.
            A few days later Allison’s daughter Palmer shared her beautiful Barbie house with Vanessa.    LeAnne’s daughter brought Vanessa her Princess Tiana Barbie doll for her house.   Both were unexpected pre-Christmas gifs that were treasured by Vanessa.
            Allison, LeAnne and I were grateful for a teaching moment for our daughters that encourages them to look not only to their own interests but also to the interests of others; to share, and to not hold too tightly to “things”.  
Appliances Provided
The showers of generosity continued.  Around the 10th day of Christmas someone donated a brand NEW washing machine.  (Prior to that, the family was mostly hand washing their family clothes or fighting for machines at the laundry mat).  A few days later, a new electric dryer was donated by a family who had just moved to town. When they arrived at their new home they had gas, not electric and they were happy their old/new dryer could go to a family that needed one.  The Bookers’ overnight went from hand-washing to a new washer and dryer!    This seemed to baffle Sophia as the gifts and donations were above and beyond what she could have dreamed.  Gifts that she referred to as, “God’s best!”   
My friend LeAnne had shared that she and her husband wanted to provide the Bookers’ with a new stove.   This gift was personal in that LeAnne very much enjoys cooking and providing her family with healthy meals.  She also values the quality family time around the table during dinner.  She hoped to help reduce the stress of cooking in the Bookers’ home.  This was yet another gift that Sophia described as God opening up heaven and pouring out his “best.”
A Timely Sale Makes the Difference
LeAnne and I had decided to take the kids to Old Navy to find some new clothes—it made more sense to find them things that they enjoyed and that fit!   The weekend that we decided to go happened to be “friends and family” weekend.  That meant everything was an additional 30% off.   We were so pleased because this meant that we would be able to get “more” for each child than we had originally anticipated.   But alas at this point I stopped looking for the “coincidences” and realized that this was yet another Sovereign provision.
An Eye-Opening Chicken Sandwich
The shopping trip was exciting and overwhelming at times…but I will say that the most humbling part was when we decided we should go to lunch.   It had been a long day of shoe and clothes shopping and we all were a little cranky and hungry.   We loaded the family in the car and took everyone to Chick-fi-la.  Everyone stood quietly waiting to order and Sophia finally said, “What is good?  We have never been here before.”  My heart ached a little in embarrassment at how often I had frequented the restaurant and taken my convenience meals for granted.  She kept exclaiming it was the BEST chicken sandwich she had ever eaten!  We were so pleased to be able to treat their family to even this simple meal…and the conversations with Sophia and her family continued to be a highlight of this 20 day adventure. 
Baby Boy Brings Beautiful Bounty
Watching so many give and share what they had with others caused me to be believe that we might even be able to share with their eldest daughter Brianna who was days away from delivering a little baby boy.  The emails went out and within 24 hours, diapers, a car seat, a baby bath, a beautiful swing, clothes and blankets were waiting to be delivered.  It was remarkable to see yet another need met in such a generous way.   I met the sweet young couple at the hospital after Justin Tyler was born and they were so very grateful for these gifts of love and support.
The Ordinary Becomes Extraordinary
The provision of others for this family was above and beyond what I could have ever imagined.  One woman offered to wrap all of the gifts that we had purchased for the children.  Yet another took all of the money she planned on using to workout that week and spent it on the family providing them with clothes and other household needs.  I offered a 6am strength class that was designated as an opportunity to donate household items and gift cards to the Bookers.  The response was tremendous.    People shared their time, their connections, and their resources.   Daily my porch was flooded with furniture, bags of clothes, and household items like toilet paper, and cleaning supplies. Sophia kept reminding me, “I need people to know, this is not stuff that we wanted, but things we really NEEDED!”   She explained that just before her husband lost his business to a down turn in the economy, they had moved in to their home.   It was a bigger house in a safer neighborhood.  The move had positioned them to better neighbors, good schools, and safer conditions;  but after his job loss, they were working to just “put food on the table and keep the lights on”.   In the midst of this season, Sophia and her husband Jerry, who have been married for 19 years, sold their wedding rings just to keep their family in the home that they currently live.   Whether we brought a new bed, washer, food or toiletries, all were received with the same amount of appreciation and gratitude! 
Not to Mention, The Unmentionables
Yet another “non-coincidence” that occurred was that I had discussed with Allison and LeAnne how great it would be to allow Sophia and Jerry to go and buy a few gifts for the family and also take care of some of their “needs” like new socks and underwear.  This was territory I was not super comfortable covering!   I had whispered a few prayers for the provision of extra “money” as this was not something that was in our budget.  Within the next 72 hours a generous Wal-Mart gift certificate was donated.   It was the ideal amount and was something that would provide for their under garment needs as well as some special gifts for the entire family. 
Making Wishes Come True
It was special to also see the provision of not just their “needs” but also a few “wishes” as well.  A brand new pink shiny bike was provided for Vanessa (the youngest) on Christmas morning.    The boys ages 10 and 13 really were hoping for a gaming system.  Allison said we should,  “pray for a system to fall from heaven.”  A few days later a gift certificate for the exact amount of a new Wii was donated explaining to use as “needed”.   Jerica, the 16 year old, really needed a computer for school.  Sohpia  explained that several assignments were online and often she had to go to the library, but because gas money was very limited, even this was becoming an issue.   In an extraordinary act of generosity, a brand new Dell computer was donated along with a printer!    In addition to all of this, a friend also shared tickets to a Hurricanes game.  The Canes inherited 2 new young fans ages 10 and 13 on the 23rd of December!  
Wearing Our Hearts on Our Sleeves (Literally)
Sophia (and I) continued to marvel at the “details”.   On the 7th day of Christmas, Allison, and LeAnne and I took Sophia to lunch.  While driving to the restaurant she expressed embarrassment about her coat.  The coat was an old camouflage army coat that belonged to her husband.   It was well worn and she was convinced since she was not able to properly do her laundry was concerned that it smelled.  I assured her that we did not care what her clothes looked like and that we simply cared about her heart.  Having said this, I knew it was still a very courageous moment for her to push past her exterior insecurities to allow us in to her life and go to lunch.   Just a few weeks later as Sophia walked up to us on the “shoe shopping day,” she was wearing jeans that fit, and a fleece jacket that looked like it had been tailor-made for her body.   I hugged her and whispered how beautiful she looked and she replied “I feel beautiful.”  We don’t need designer clothes…but an internal transformation can occur and give us confidence when we have clothes that fit and make us feel beautiful.  For many of us, this is a luxury that we take for granted.  It was wonderful to be able to give Sophia and her family this gift. 
Oh What A Night
One of my favorite nights was a night that we decided to “carol” the family and deliver one of the truck loads of gifts.   Jerry and Sophia (the parents) were actually at the hospital with their oldest daughter and their grandson.  Jerica (16) welcomed us in, and about 20 strangers congregated in the Bookers’ living room.  The room was full of joy, full of music, full of smiles, and full of love.  Jerica (who loves Christmas) told me later that it was one of her favorite nights ever.  She was such a precious hostess and it was such a beautiful picture of two unlikely worlds colliding…all to make it… “the best Christmas ever”! 
In a continued indicator of this 20 days being much bigger than we could have ever dreamed or imagined…I will briefly share this story:
The night we went caroling it came to our attention that there was another family who was in need and could use some assistance this Christmas.   In the abundance of generosity that was poured out toward the Booker family; we had some additional clothes, toys and household items.   The family in need lived close to the Bookers and so after we caroled their family we caroled this new family and delivered items to the young couple and their 4 year old daughter.  They were shocked by this random act of kindness.  The mom wrote a kind and heart-felt note of appreciation:
“What you all did was so inspiring and probably one of the nicest things that has ever happened to me in all my 32 years (honestly) and thank you for for showing my Daughter how nice and kind people can be and the magic of Christmas caroling (we have never seen that), it made me think that I spend so much time teaching her the dangers of strangers and to be safe that maybe I forget to mention more often all the wonderful giving caring people in the world.
You went above and beyond and you helped us have a great Christmas not only in material gifts but also the gifts of the heart and helping us remember the things that are most important ( Love Helping others Friendship/Family and God).”
Families and Friendship
         It was my hope that we would not just drop off gifts but get quality time with the Booker family.   I was drawn to Sophia as she is woman of generosity herself.  She shares a home with her grandmother and mother.  She is raising her nephew, and quick to be helpful with her grandson and daughter who are out of the home.  The children have wonderful manners and do not believe they are entitled to anything they receive.  I admire her leadership in her home and I appreciate her children and how kind they have been to my children.  Allison, LeAnne and I hope to continue to stay connected to this family.  The friendships that have formed are just as much of a blessing as witnessing the material provisions provided over the 20 days of Christmas. 
Slowing down this Christmas did mean “doing less” at times.  It meant a few less parties, a few less trips to the mall, and a few less cookies made.  It meant doing less, but accomplishing more.  It meant deep impact made on our own lives as well as the lives of so many.  It meant bridging the gap between two worlds and finding common ground.  It meant opening ourselves up to the lives of others, and watching a sovereign God orchestrate a miracle in and through us, just like he did many Christmases ago.
Thank you for the role you played in making this the “best Christmas ever”. 
 May you be a blessing and may you be blessed.

Jenni 

Cockerham Family Christmas Card

“God came to us because He wanted to join us on the road, to listen to our story…This is the great mystery of Christmas that continues to give us comfort and consolation:  we are not alone on our journey.”    

Henri Nouwen


Wishing you a Merry Christmas and a real sense of His presence on your journey!        

Love, 
Chris, Jenni, Kylee, Caleb, and Joshua

Family Fun Run on Thanksgiving

Caleb would like to be a vet when he grows up!
Kylee was a mouse in the Nutcracker  this year
Dad and Joshua
Our “baby” turned 3!
The Three Musketeers

Joshua wearing his favorite outfit and cape!
He says he wants to be a super hero when he grows up.
Chris and Jenni did the Metro Dash this year.
Chris actually ran it twice…impressive!
Hannah and Jenni enjoying a snow day.

Christmas Simplicity…

This morning I was touched by a Christmas card we received.  It was from a 20-something young man with autism.   Brandon lives with his parents in Oxford, does not drive, and leads a very simple humble life.  Brandon met Chris and I through Young Life many years ago.  He latched on to Chris and of course Chris loved Brandon with a wreckless abandon.  Quite honestly I was less patient as Brandon would call our home, our office (we worked together), and our cells several times a week.  Always at the most inopportune time.   He just wanted to touch base and let Chris know the most recent happenings in his life…the mail came, he bought a new baseball card, etc.  In the “busyness” of my life and ministry I often would become annoyed by Brandon’s calls.  Over the years and through the switching of vocations, the calls were less frequent…but Brandon has stayed connected to Chris.

This morning I opened a card from Brandon simply saying,

“Dear Christopher, Jennifer, Kylee, Caleb and Joshua–(seriously he knew all my kids names???)–


Let me start off by saying what an amazing year this has been (although we have not talked much this year).    But I look forward to the next year and what it has to offer.  Finally, I would like to wish you and yours a safe, wonderful, blessed, and Merry Christmas.  May God continue to bless all of y’all. 


Love, 


Brandon and Family”

I was STRUCK by his simplicity.  STRUCK by his joy.  (What has made his year so amazing?)  I doubt he won the lottery or even had any major event happen that we would normally consider “amazing”.  He is just simply thankful and was quick to find the joy in the past year of his life.  He is gracious with us that we have not been in touch–not annoyed or bitter–but hopeful of more time in the future.  And what a beautiful “wish” I have not been wished a more sincere Christmas “wish” in my lifetime!

Forgive me Brandon for missing the simplicity of our friendship in the past.  Forgive me for being too rushed to slow down…I missed your heart…I missed YOU.

I have learned many lessons this morning–ones that I hope to carry me well through the Christmas season.  I hope to remember to stand in awe of the little things.  I hope to be gracious with others.  I also hope to send SINCERE well wishes and blessings.  My friend Brandon who many would say in this world is “the least of these” and “simple” taught me GREAT WISDOM today!

God says that he uses the foolish to shame the wise.   I am SO very thankful.

May YOU be a blessing and may you be blessed!

Jenni